[China Glass Network] The more common words of "harmony and wealth" illustrate a more profound truth: "interpersonal relationship" is one of the more important resources of enterprises. But so far, many companies in China have not spent much of their time to develop valuable resources such as interpersonal relationships.
For individual employees, according to Carnegie's point of view: only 15% of a person's career success is due to his professional skills, and another 85% depends on interpersonal relationships and skills.
Sincere praise
Sincerely praise is better than playing a beautiful drift on the calm and dull lake. It can stir up layers of waves and bursts, making the whole atmosphere lively.
Sincere praise requires certain skills.
Carnegie has told a story like this:
Once, I went to the post office to send a registered letter. There are many people, and I lined up. I found that the registered staff was very impatient with his work - calling letters, selling stamps, looking for change, writing invoices, I thought: Maybe it was something unpleasant he had encountered today, maybe year after year. The work of monotonous and repetitive work has long been annoying. Therefore, I said to myself: "I want this man to like me. Obviously, to make him like me, I must say something that makes him happy." So I asked myself, "What does he really deserve to appreciate? A little bit, I immediately saw a point that I really appreciated in him.
Therefore, when he was calling my letter, I was very sincere and said: "I really hope to have your hair."
He looked up, a little surprised, smiling. "Oh, not as good as it used to be," he replied modestly. I am sure to tell him that although your hair has lost a bit of original luster, it still looks good. He is very happy. We talked happily, and the later sentence he said to me was: "A lot of people praised my hair." I bet that this man will be in a minor tune on the way home that day; I bet he will mention this to his wife after he goes home; I bet he will say to the mirror: "This is indeed a beautiful hair." I am very happy to think of this. .
If you can turn sincere praise into a habit, then it is easy to find a place worthy of praise. One of the major gains of the author's study of the Carnegie course is to understand that the cardinal basics have this habit.
Generally speaking: how to find a place where a person really deserves sincere praise also has certain rules to follow. For example, the elderly should praise his glorious past, healthy body, happy family or promising children. Etc. Praising her child to a young mother is often more effective than praising her directly...
say sorry
The talented Rossi wrote a story like this:
In the company where I used to work, the interpersonal relationship is very complicated. Whoever does not accept anyone, whoever does not want anyone, hates each other, and goes to work like revenge. It is very unhappy.
Soon, I changed a manager, surnamed Wang.
When Manager Wang took office, he summoned us. He smiled and said: "I'm sorry, I am older than you. So I became a manager first." So the opening remarks made everyone laugh, then thunderous applause. He is not like a manager, but we like it.
Manager Wang said that we often shirk our responsibilities or argue with people in order to protect ourselves. We do not know that admitting mistakes may not be a confession. Even if we admit mistakes, we will admit defeat. How can one person win forever? A person dares to admit mistakes and dare to admit defeat. This is not only not shameful, but can win the understanding and respect of others. Saying "I'm sorry" can not only express personal cultivation, but also reflect on yourself, motivate upwards, and turn it into a jade.
Manager Wang’s words made the audience silent. Our arrogance, rudeness, selfishness and prejudice are often the triggers of conflict. We all cursed the harsh working environment, but we forgot to review it: whether it is also the initiator of this harsh environment...
This story has certain enlightening significance, but it gives us a question that must be answered: Why do you say that if you say sorry, you can often resolve conflicts?
In abstract terms, everyone admits that people are not sages. However, in specific conflicts, many people think that they are correct and that the problems are on others. Generally speaking, conflicts and conflicts occur. Both sides have certain responsibilities, but the size of the responsibility is different. If the two sides do not admit their mistakes, the interpersonal relationship will only become more and more tense. On the contrary, if one party voluntarily admits that he is wrong, he takes the initiative. Sorry, the contradiction is easier to solve. In an environment where “I'm sorry†is very scarce, if you can suddenly hear “I'm sorry,†your inner feelings will pass like a warm current!
Need to change
1. The assumption that others are perfect, there is no "void" in the heart to tolerate the shortcomings or weaknesses of others;
2, after the occurrence of contradictions and conflicts, only from one perspective of their own, the more you want to get more and more angry, you can't get out of the horns.
3. In a period of time, "praising others" and "sorry to say" as a training activity of the company, so that sincere praise and dare to say sorry to become the habit of employees.
Psychological research shows that a person has to change a simpler habit, at least 21 times. If you want to change a long-term habitual action (such as switching to the left hand), it will take half a year to be handy.
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